America's Next Top Model
Cycle 11 Episode 12

We're almost at the end of this cycle. This one seemed to go faster than the rest and definitely was more entertaining than the last. After the rehash of Elina's cut last week we get a Tyra Mail or Post, rather, we are in Europe after all, teasing them about their next adventure.

Our next event is a workshop and is lead by Paulina. She was wearing a great purple outfit with a wonderfully cut portrait collar, but the one thing I noticed is that Paulina looked incredibly old. Did the cameraman forget to pack his filter? She coached the girls on how to sell product by displaying their senses rather than describing with words. McKey was the golden child and Samantha did well if the sense was manic in nature. Analeigh came across genuine, but tended to forget to emote to the camera. Marjorie was the nervous mess we have come to expect.

During a commercial break we got a look at one of Tyra's new projects. It's a film called The Clique. It comes across as the most obnoxious tween crap that has come out since Mean Girls. I got a stomach ache just watching the promo.

After the break comes the challenge. Paulina informs our beauties that they have to perform in another commercial and has magically subtracted 10 years off her face. Much better. The winner of this challenge is receiving a 10K shopping spree at G-Star, a Holland based denim designer which I was surprised to discover via Google is somewhat affordable. Instead of the walking and talking mess we got with the last ad, the girls don't have to say a word. They have to jog along while flirting with a guy and finally make a bold move by planting a big kiss on him. The guy just happens to be Mark Vanderloo who works for big names like Versace, Donna Karen and Calvin Klein. Handsome, yes, but he seemed a little old to be in this fake ad.

Samantha is up first and is a little taken aback that she is on a treadmill rather than shooting outside. I got the impression they would be going on set as well, but this is much cheaper, no doubt. She was hammy, but completely believable if you are familiar with her personality. Analeigh was very good as well and did the shy flirt thing very well. Mckey was okay, but a little forced and Marjorie was her quirky nervous self and the director loved it. She was named the winner and hauled Analeigh off to nab the goods. Marjorie is a good kid and divvied up the goodies 50-50 with Analeigh. I would have liked to have seen what they got.


The next segment seemed so producer driven and should have been left on the cutting room floor. The girls invite over the young men that drove them around for their go-sees last week. Marjorie attempts to exorcise her nervous demons by applying copius amounts of alcohol and acting the ho. McKey shows us her womanly wiles by wrestling one of the guys and Samantha wows the fellas with her card tricks. Analeigh busts up the party after Marjorie jumps in the tub with one of the guys. Analeigh made her momma so proud tonight.

Whitney ad. Holy crap - what happened to Whitney's tits? Didn't Tyra tell her something about keeping them things under control? The ad had her walking towards the camera and her big bouncing busoms were so distracting I can't even remember what she was selling this week. I liked Whitney last cycle, but I am hating these ads.

Photoshoot. Windmills and the beautiful Holland countryside is our backdrop. Too bad the girls are made up to look like they are from the Dawn of the Dead: Vogue Edition. Analeigh was first up and was doing some amazing things with a pickfork. She uses her head and thinks about what would make a good shot and that is helping her along in this competition. Marjorie had a rat's nest tied to the side of her head and did a editorial type pose which looked pretty impressive, but looking editorial has always been her strength. Samantha wasn't hitting it like she usually does. Her shoes were uncomfortable and it showed in her face. Mr. Jay coached her into some good shots towards the end, but she was the weakest in the pack tonight. She also had the fewest props and once she was given something to hold in this case a shovel she had something to work with. McKey, the beloved, comes out and has Mr. Jay and the photographer are loving her every move. I thought the makeup made her look like a basset hound, but the photo did come out stunning. I thought it was a bit unfair that she was the only one that got to use the windmill to hang off of.

Since Marjorie got so loose at the house party by knocking back a few I was wondering if we were going to see her take a snort before panel, but it appears she went in sober. Stone cold sober. In an attempt to control her nerves she suppressed herself so much she came off cold. I think we all know that she is going to be in the bottom two simply because of her demeanor. She hasn't the confidence it will take to present herself well, yet.

Analeigh took best photo with an amazing shot of her jumping while holding on to the pitchfork. It was crazy and interesting and really deserved first place. McKey took second place and that was no surprise. That girl can do no wrong. Samantha got stuck in the bottom two with Marjorie because her weak film this week and her inability to present herself as a model. I think what Tyra is subletly saying is that Samantha needs to work on her maturity level. I'm still rooting for Sam because she has the fire in the belly I think they need and I also think she would make a great CG spokesmodel.

Before we get the panel results Nigel tells us about this week's Top Model in Action who turns out to be Kim from Cycle 5. She was the self proclaimed lesbian who worked the androgynous look all the way up to the final five in her cycle. She's ditched that look and gone blond to work for as a reporter for MTV. I don't know if I would have recognized her without beign told.

Last week's prediction came true. Marjorie is sent home, hopefully with a better sense of self (and a lot of new clothes). I think she will do well once she gets it together.

We get a look at the final runway. Mr. Jay describes it as "Dr Seussian." It's fuschia, has stairs and curves and hills. I can't wait to see what wacked out clothes they are going to have to wear while navagating that course.

Next week it will be all over for this cycle. sniff